February Letter | #3: keep it to one side

Dear Pedestrians,

Please check to see if anyone is walking behind you before you inexplicably stop in the middle of the pathway. Don’t act all surprised when we almost collide – YOU CAUSED IT. And don’t accept MY apology either. I’m being polite, but you should really accept the you were at fault. Don’t just say that it’s alright when again, you foolishly stopped. It’s just rude.

Another thing, please stay to one side if you know that you’re going to be walking at snails pace. Not the middle. One side. One fucking side. And while I’m at it, that applies to escalators too, man. I don’t care if you need to stand next to your boo, keep it to one side.

Which way? Pick a side. PICK A DAMN SIDE. I have playing which way with y’all. It’s tiring.

And for the love of zebras, please look up from your stupid phone when crossing the damn street. I am tired of idiots either getting in my way or straight up WALKING INTO ME because they couldn’t look up for ten seconds. Your phone will still be there. It won’t run away.

To runners – I appreciate that you want to stay fit but running through a packed street is sort of unnecessary. Find somewhere quiet. You’ll enjoy your run better and I’ll enjoy not almost being trampled.

To conclude, please make sure your outside etiquette is on point. Thank you.



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I snark about things. I'm also a señorita who used to have picture of D-List actors as her avatar. Now it's a pen. So... expect greatness from me. Or something.

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