Life

Dear Self…

I can’t seem to shake my awful mood so I’m turning to snark. Self-snark. Random snark. Whatever works. 
First of all:

Fuck that, self, you need to calm down and read the letter below. 

Dear Self,

Today has been a shit week for various reasons, none of which you know. Monday was the beginning. Getting up was hard. Like, just stay in bed and never ever leave it again hard. You know from doing this that this is the best way to make things worse, so you got up. Went to work. Work was shit, but that’s a given anyway. 

Anyway, self, let’s try and focus on the positives. 

Which are…. well, I can’t think of any right now but they must exist. They must. 

Or maybe they don’t. 

Even so, nothing good comes out of feeling like crap, or feeling miserable and I know that people will say, feel how you feel, but we don’t want to do that self. We want to feel better. 

So, take whatever it is that makes you feel better for even a nanosecond and amplify that. Make that rainbow burst into a pot of gold, or something far more realistic like eating a carton of ice cream. Distract yourself, and don’t let this shitty mood get you too down. 

Draw cartoon characters, write. Write, write and write more because that’s what you’re kind of good at. The drawing is hit and miss. You’re too lazy to get better at it, so just stick to what you know. Or don’t. Who cares?

Stay away from social media because let’s be real, it causes enough issues for you without the depressed mood. Just one perfectly fine picture of pasta is enough to have you feeling like a failure for not being able to serve food prettily. 

Once again, fuck that. 

And while we’re at it, I know that you’re mostly joking about being hermit but can you not? We need people to buy us nice gifts and to talk to and stuff. Mostly gifts because buying stuff for yourself? Is only fun when you’ve got the money and we definitely don’t have the money, self. 

So yeah, self, get your shit together and feel shitty but also be thankful for where you are today. Even if people try to put you down, wait for them to turn around and then give them the finger. It’ll make you feel better and that’s what we need. 

Lots of love and teeny bit of irritation,

Your snarky self. 

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