Fun fact about me: I have a Pinterest board of motivational quotes.
I’d get low and start saving them because apparently they made me felt better.
They really don’t.
Most of them are fluffy nonsense that make sense in theory but not to much in reality.
For that reason, I’ve decided to take one for the team and dissect ten random motivational quotes from my Pinterest board. You’re all welcome.
Okay, so my board isn’t full of motivational quotes, just snark.
There are some legit motivational quotes in there, but I think they’re buried under the snark.
Let’s try this again.
…yeah, unless you’re a serial killer. Seriously, what does this mean? No one is you so, yay, you’re awesome! We’re all special snowflakes? Okay then.
Vanilla Ice begs to differ.
What kind of pep talk is that? My pep talks include more insults and swearing.
Example: What the fuck is wrong with you? Stop being so stupid, you egg. Be productive and do what you fucking need to do for fuck’s sake. PUT THE CHOCOLATE DOWN. WAIT. Pick it up. Shit.
If I told myself I loved myself I don’t think I’d get anything done. I’d be too busy taking selfies and slaying on Instagram.
Go for what? Syphilis? Can we be more specific?
Were you lost before? Like, physically lost? Did you use Google Maps to find yourself? Girl.
This isn’t motivational, this is what happens when you’re running late and you didn’t have time to look up where you’re going. Or when you decide to take a ‘shortcut’ that must be there even though you’ve never taken it before.
I didn’t realise that shapeshifters really existed. I guess this person graduated from Hogwarts.
Yeah, because I was torn on whether or not I’d pick between happy and miserable before. Thanks for the direction.
Actually, I kind of like this one. It’s direct and to the point.
The way motivational quotes should be.