It was one of those days. My lie-in had turned into full on hermit mode. I’m talking, drawn curtains and pitch black because it was nine pm and the day was almost over.
Luckily for me, it was a Saturday and not a work day. It would have been awkward to call in sick several hours after the work day had ended.
Hi, I’m calling to say that I wasn’t at work today. I’m not sure if you noticed. Sometimes it’s like I’m invisible.
Either way, after browsing through my phone (which was devoid of any messages such was the extent of my popularity), I started to reassure myself that I had good reason to be at home.
It’s probably raining. Bad weather was a perfectly good excuse to do nothing for twenty four hours.
A quick peek outside and I saw that it was bone dry.
Where was this weather last week when I was stuck looking like a drowned rat at my frenemy’s wedding?
With that thought in mind, I fished around for my remote and decided that I’d watch something.
Two cappuccinos, three bagels, four scoops of Salted Caramel Haagen Dazs ice cream and five episodes for Law and Order: SVU later, I decided that I was never leaving the house again.
They’re getting shorter but the whole point is to write something daily so I’ll give myself a break.
This week I bought a new exfoliating face brush and a body sponge. Why is that noteworthy, you ask. Well, I got them from the men’s section. Obviously, I am not a man, but there are so many problems with women’s beauty products. Especially sponges. Right now exfoliating is the buzzword, but I just want something that will make my skin feel clean.
Before I bought the face brush, I was using a Konjac sponge. Apparently, I was doing it all wrong and I should have chucked it months ago. Despite that, all the time I was using it I wasn’t really comfortable with it. I mean, it’s a small puffy thing, so it wasn’t a major headache but I need something that could potentially take half of my skin off. Moisturiser does it’s job but sometimes your skin needs an extra kick.
Unfortunately, the way the market is, you have to buy a million things before you find what you want. Especially for women. There’s so much choice because they know we’re going to spend a shit ton of money trying to look good or feel good. It’s like having to spend your entire life ordering pizza. There’s a lot to choose from.
For instance, I can’t count the number of those stupid body puff things I’ve bought.
Apparently, they are germ infested balls of joy but that’s not even my problem with them. All they do is create A LOT of lather that’s really useless. Lather doesn’t mean you’re getting cleaner. It’s just an annoying side effect of a shower.
Funny story, I am slightly hydrophobic. I used to panic every time my mother washed my hair when I was a kid and when I started doing it, I’d panic whenever water hit my face. Even now, I hate my nose being blocked my lather. It makes me feel like I can’t breathe. Ick.
Going back to showering, I am prone to eczema so I sometimes just use my hands. I’m also prone to tardiness so I end up using my hands because it’s quicker. However, come the weekend, I require a deep cleanse to make up for the lack of sponge use. Do I get it? Hardly ever. Why? Too many options that don’t do anything!
We have the washcloth. The washcloth is like the using a piece of bread for me. There’s friction but it’s minimal and ironically, it doesn’t produce enough lather (when using liquid shower gel). I avoid them for the most part.
Next, there are massage sponges, which are super cheap and not worth complaining about, but this is me. I’m going to complain. These have one rough side and a flat side that’s really soft. I’m not sure which side is supposed to do the massaging but I use the rough side and it’s great. For a week or so before it starts to fall apart and you’re picking parts of the sponge off yourself.
There are the loofahs, which range between being quick to wear out or impossible to use without hacking away at it with scissors.
There are exfoliating mitts which are actually really good. I need to buy more.
There’s the lovely back brush which should really just come with black bristles at all times. The one I have is really harsh on the skin, which I like! However, I’m not looking to take a layer of skin off each time I shower.
Even worse is the back brush with the puff attached. WHAT A USELESS CONTRAPTION.
After all of that, this week I gave up and went to the men’s section.
It’s smaller, cheaper and there’s not a web a smidge of pink. I don’t have a problem with pink or white, but really? Can we have some different colours. Or black. Black is good.
Anyway, to cut a long and possibly confusing story short, I bought a men’s exfoliating brush and sisal body pad. Both were cheaper than the women’s version despite being the same thing. Sure, men and women are different but skin is skin. There’s no justification for the price difference AT ALL.
In fact the brush was much better than the last one I had. It’s kind of like a toilet brush for your face but whatever. That’s a good thing. The body pad was also decent.
While I’m on this rant, why are women’s razors always pink? And more expensive? In the UK, it turned out that they were taxed more than male razors (probably because they’re pink) and IIRC, instead of making them cheaper the government decided to ‘donate’ the tax. Eff that. If I didn’t need that damn Vitamin E moisture strip (that probably doesn’t do anything), I’d just buy men’s razors.
Anyway, yes, I’ve had this whole rant in my head this week so I figured that I’d share it here.
I am so sorry.
ETA: This sort of fits the #SOCS theme so this is officially my entry, lol!