how I feel

Eventually, I’m going to have to come up with a chronological order of That Guy posts so that it makes sense.

Cliff notes: Met TG months ago at work, we became friends, I guess. He was trying it on, I was resistant until he swooped in during a week where I wasn’t myself, asked for my number and then didn’t reply to my text. After that he blanked me, before I managed to corner him and extract the world’s worst apology.

This post picks up from last week, which is unfortunate because I have a vague update of sorts here, but I suppose this is clearer.

Friday 16th March 2018

Friday was all about the aftermath of the past few days. I did dampen my pillow at one point, but other than that I just have this weird feeling in my chest. It could be over That Guy, or it might be down to the dodgy cupcake that I ate.

Your guess is as good as mine.

I spent the morning laughing about the situation with a friend. I was contemplating texting him, but at this point, I’m at the the give it one more day stage.  So, I’m now hoping that I see him on Monday so that I can see how it’s going to go from this point forward.

Monday 19th March 2018

Well, it went… awkwardky. I saw him. I am sure that he saw me. I haven’t reached that point where his ugly personality overwhelms his physical attributes. Anyway, yeah. Luckily, he seems to be keeping his distance. Or not so luckily because I don’t get a chance to say fucking sort yourself out. 

I said I wasn’t angry, and I’m not over his excuse. That’s his problem. His behaviour, though. The longer it goes on, the more I start to have self-doubt. Soon I’m going to invent a whole story about how this is my fault. Heck. I already have. I didn’t text him in time, I made him type his own number into my phone…

…(is that bad? I had a headache and I wasn’t ready to listen to someone recite a number 3-4 times. I also told him that my head was all-over the place. He did seem kind of weird after he gave me the number. He was off in general, and pissed off about something – all unrelated to me, lol. I spoke to him for a bit and everything was fine. I also then got into an argument in front of him, and kind of stormed past him. I don’t think any of that really excuses his behaviour, though)…

My text wasn’t enthusiastic enough. Maybe it was all part of a bet, maybe he doesn’t like the way I look without make up (yes, I stopped to WTF at this one). The list is endless.

I am not doing anything to him, so… I don’t really get it. I can’t be anymore chill. If I was a skunk bag skeeze, I would mess with someone like me. No frantic texts, no chasing me down repeatedly. I’ve been so cool. Maybe too cool. Not just because I have my pride, but because the situation doesn’t warrant that kind of behaviour. Yes, I’m hurting somewhat, but that’ll fade. Well. It fucking better.

This is the point in the movie where I’d key his car in slow motion while some kind of female anthem plays in the background. Followed by a montage of me in bed eating ice cream while I over think everything.

Who wants to play me in the movie?

I’ll pay you in hugs. LOL.

Tuesday 21st March 2018

I saw TG upstairs. I was directly in front of him. I was speaking to someone, so it was clearly me. He didn’t say a single word to me and I didn’t say anything either.
Some time after that my manager had a ‘word’ with me. I was really pissed off afterwards and it was showing on my face, I guess. Plus someone was whistling badly and I was just ugh at that point. I was irritated and angry.

Obviously, TG picks that moment to come strolling directly past me. I was hoping that he would go quietly but he asked if I was ok. I said yes. He said that I didn’t look happy (no fucking shit) and he was acting like it was funny. I just ignored him. He needs to get over himself.

Unfortunately for me, he was right there, so it was impossible to ignore him. Eventually, I got back into what I was doing. Some time later while walking past again, he was looking at me and clearly trying to get my attention. I looked up and he says, ‘are you sure no one’s upset you?‘. I said yes. He said, ‘it doesn’t seem that way.’ I went ‘hmm’ and he ‘hmm’d back and started laughing again…😒


P.S. The next post will be a direct continuation. Lol!


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